Choose to Identify your Core Values

We don’t CHOOSE our Values, We IDENTIFY our Values by our decisions – especially our decisions in the tough times.

A value is a way of being or believing that we hold most important.

Brene Brown

It would be so easy if we could just pick our values from a long list of feel-good words like: integrity, generosity, kindness, efficiency, responsibility, optimism, faith, compassion, fun, courage, joy and the list goes on… and then work on living by those values.

But if we’re honest with ourselves, how many times do we tell ourselves that we want to be Generous, but the minute our bank balance gets uncomfortably low, do we reassess our expenses and start pulling back on some of our charitable expenses instead of cutting back on our personal indulgences?

So in the face of competing values, which one wins over the lesser value every time? Living more authentically, with more integrity (root word ‘integer’/’whole’), equates to living as a whole person, undivided, with no cognitive dissonance – the separation of heart (beliefs) and hand (actions). What a way to live a life of true freedom – behaving in a way that is aligned with our core desires!

Out of the treasure of our hearts, do we express who we are.

Matthew 12:34-35

Brene Brown found that, “research participants who demonstrated the most willingness to rumble with vulnerability and practice courage tethered their behaviour to one or two values, not ten.”

And to quote Jim Collins #truth:

“If you have more than three priorities, you have no priorities.”

Jim Collins

Well, some time ago I whittled down my list of core values that define me to 5 words because it was easy to remember that I am MAGIC:

• Mastery of self [1 Cor 6:12] and living in servanthood to Christ [Col 3:23]

• Authenticity in relationships [Eph 4:15]

• Growth in character and skills [Col 1:10]

• Identity firmly fixed on Christ [Matt 6:22]

• Courage to always do right [Eph 6:13]

To level up following Brene’s advice above, I’m accepting the challenge to do some inner work and IDENTIFY which 1-2 words truly define me at the core. Because I’m not foolish enough to let my ego [society, family, peer pressure] tell me what I SHOULD be; I’d rather swallow the truth pill now and listen to what treasures I truly hold in my heart, especially being a Bible-based Christ-follower [Romans 12:2], so that I won’t be like a wave driven with the wind and tossed when tough decisions are called for. [James 1:6,8]

Of course most of us would want to ALSO live by the multiple worthy values of kindness, compassion, generosity, humility, ambition, learning, etc. … so the good news is that Brene found in her research that the core 1-2 values were how the “second tier” values were tested.

In my case, my #1 core value of Authenticity (no surprise there – I can’t stand “fake” people who hide behind their public persona masks) in alignment with my #2 core value of Courage means that I will always choose abundance over scarcity, hope over despair, joy over gloom, compassion over hardness of heart, and honesty over fraud.

Now it’s your turn…

RESET your heart through some inner work of identifying your 1-2 core values. It’s okay to list all the values that are important to you; but keep going and whittle down that list until you are able to name the top two most powerful words that define your being.

“An unexamined life is not worth living”

socrates

You may also choose to pray using the words of King David, the “man after God’s own heart”:

Search me, O God, and know my heart: try me, and know my thoughts…

Psalms 139:23

after that…

RELEASE yourself to live a life that is truly in alignment with your core values that you can now name, identify, and hold up as your spirit level for your spirit [pun intended]… to live that life of #truefreedom.